Searching for Joy

Today I woke up with a pain in my chest. I tried to write it away, to pray it away, to read it away. I know that it is both spiritual and physical. I have fought for joy by trying to remember the times of joy. I have taken pictures of things and memories that make me happy on my Instagram and my blog.


How does one fight for joy when your body and soul strive against you?

There is so much to grieve over in the world. One of my students was a puddle of pouring tears today. After talked about what was troubling her, she reminded me of a perfect way to deal with the pain, singing praises. She was signing and singing, a look of peace and rest of her face.

This afternoon, my fight faltered as I started feeling terribly sick, so I went to the urgent care. It turns out that they had received blood work from the last time I had visited them, a few weeks ago. I have now been diagnosed with whooping cough and walking pneumonia, but, because I had antibiotics already, I’m not contagious. A breathing treatment, chest x-ray, and steroid shot later, I started feeling better.

I am so thankful! I was able to run some errands, take a bath, and even sing. Yes, sing! My heart filled with joy! I had a reason why I wasn’t feeling well, other than the fibro normal, and had been given the gift of modern medicine. Although I felt terrible while taking the breathing treatment, I realized that all of this medicine, all of this treatment that may seem like a pain, is truly a gift. I am so blessed to live in an age where I won’t die of whooping cough! Sure, health issues are annoying, but I am so glad that I have doctors that care about my well-being and give me what I need to be well.


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